What do you get when you mix a nightlife king, David Grutman, with a Grammy award-winning artist, Pharrel Williams, and a season 2012 winner on Top Chef Europe, Frenchman Jean Imbert?

You get a God-awful restaurant, that is what you get.

I don’t care how much money was spent on the design and decor, or which celebrity is gracing the place, or how hot the scene is. The food was subpar. Some dishes were inedible, and the service, well let’s just say they aren’t exactly polished. They don’t even make a decent cocktail! How do you screw that up?

They call the menu, “modern European cuisine”. Really? They must be banking on patrons who are not too knowledgeable or picky. The menu darts around the globe. Nothing sounds appealing and, guess what? It doesn’t taste appealing either. I’m not going to bother telling you what I ordered the two times I dined there. Yes, it wasn’t very pleasant to return but I did it so you won’t have to.

Why spend so much money on the atmosphere when you obviously don’t care about the quality of the food?

Despite my outburst, the place is ridiculously busy. Maybe they are hoping to catch sight of a celebrity, or they are drawn in by the garden, which is an oasis in this neighbourhood, although you probably have to sleep with someone or tip heavily to get a table there. Otherwise, you may be seated in one of the few indoor rooms, which are all decorated in a different, feminine style. There is also an upstairs cocktail lounge called, “Bevy”.

The paper said there was an emphasis on clean eating. I couldn’t find one lite, healthy option except for a salad that was drowning in dressing. They said I could add chicken, which I did. You think they could cut the chicken in nice, neat even pieces. It was one ugly salad. We had to send back the octopus, it was so tough and over salted. Oh wait, I said I wouldn’t talk about the food …

The servers were so unprofessional, they were clearing our table as we were eating, and the dishes came too quickly, which is not their fault but the kitchens. In the men’s bathroom, where there are no urinals, and an attendant began using a lint brush on my husband without asking. If he was looking for a tip, he has the wrong approach.

All in all a very unsatisfactory experience. I haven’t said this in a long time… not recommended.

Happy dining,
Shanea

2 Comments

  1. Cookie Sandler says:

    Hey Shanea I went with a couple of friends from Lake Simcoe to Swan last Sunday. Michael’s was too busy and it was getting late. At Swan they were very happy to seat us. Unfortunately it was right in front of a big speaker., We asked about changing tables and when we told the manager why, he turned the speaker down to low. A great start. My friends love food and ordered quite a few dishes. Everything was very tasty and the service was great. Instead of dessert my friends chose to have the pancake and the cinnamon role from the regular brunch menu. Too good. Although the bar and club area on the upper levels were not open, the manager offered us a tour. I declined but told him we would be back.

  2. Shanea says:

    Glad to hear you had a good experience. Unfortunately not for me on both occasions.
    Shanea

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